The US elections 2024

The American elections are like reality TV on meth. The last 2 weeks have provided enough drama to fill an entire season of Made in Chelsea: Washington DC. It’s no wonder they have a history of electing actors with zero political experience. 

For this year’s elections the choice was between a convicted criminal, and a senile granddad. Granddad has since stepped aside and made way for his super smiley female sidekick, who is now going to take the fight to the Orange Julius Caesar. Oh, did I mention that Don J Whoreleon was shot through the ear?! Yep. 

The entertainment factor is next level. Nobody cares about the party’s policies or telling the truth. In this reality show you can literally say anything you like regardless of whether it’s true. In fact, the more outrageously untrue your statements are, the better! It’s brilliant. Then you have the teams, or tribes of the two candidates. The blue team is made up of mostly rich, city dwelling folk and celebrities, and the red team is made up of mostly racist rednecks, survivalists, preppers, and raging lunatics who believe the other team eats children and their own team leader, MAGA Theresa, is an alien God come to save the world from Armageddon. 

The only shame about the whole thing is that, like the Olympics, it only comes around every four years. I really think they should consider doing it every two years. It’s just way too much fun to have to wait 4 years for the next season of the show. I mean how often do you get to see a self-proclaimed Yellowstone shaman wolf-man leading a riot and storming government buildings?! But that was so last season.

This season might be the best season yet...

U.S.A!!! U.S.A!!!